jenny

for a long time - actually a short time - but for a long time, i had decided that it was appropriate to name my guitar, the way men name their penises. i figured, if they can name their significant appendage, so can i.

so i named her jenny - simple 'ol white girl jenny. the kind of jenny that forrest gump falls in love with, minus the crack and southern accent, which would have technically make her "jinny." anyway, there's no way that a musical instrument could be anything less than a female, unless it's a recorder, which doesn't fall into a gendered category. so sorry. but music, and anything that makes it, feels innately feminine. like men who sing. actually, no. that's kind of hot. i digress.

the point is, in light of all my recent musical revelations, i have realized how much i miss jenny. i've been writing songs like a maniac but i have nothing to pick up and just play... even though i suck.

so i've asked a friend at school if i could maybe borrow his guitar. apparently, i can't unless i come over, get drunk over a few beers, and play music. this is, given my fear of playing in public, highly unlikely. *sigh* i guess i'll just keep writing and singing in my room.

oh jenny, i miss you.

music makes the people come together

there is something magical about being in the presence of individuals who can create beautiful music with their voices. i have to admit, nothing is more impressive than a truly remarkable voice... art and dance are both amazing forms of expression, but there is something unique in having the ability to experience sound - in knowing that you can close your eyes and sit still, yet feel as though you are moving. there is nothing i would rather do than be in the company of someone who could make me feel that way.

i often forget how talented my friends are, especially the greenies. we sing and sing and yet, i feel as though i rarely hear all of their voices - you join the group, you become part of the whole. that's the way teams and clubs and groups work. even with solos, i never feel satisfied in thinking i know any of their voices.

i was in bed not feeling my best last night when they came back from pizza house and congregated in my room. somehow, sometime into the night, the lights in my room went off, the sex lights went on, and the pack of regular kids in my room turned into the most talented people i've had the opportunity to know. one by one, each greenie took his/her turn singing a song of choice, and i can't even begin to explain how impressed i was, sitting there with the most talented group of people on campus hands down.

i can't believe i am a part of this family. i love my greenies.